EVERYTHING.

so this is probably the last blog i will do this year.. whooray for new years eve! i think i should sum up this year, but first i need to tell you what happened this weekend...

Well we went up to the cottage [ Me, Reid, Ben, Taylor, Ashley, Sukie, Spencer ] i left the cottage , like twice.. no joke ahaha. it was so cold outside and there was waaay too much snow for my boots to handle. but anyways.. on to the important things... like the nights.

BASICALLY. the thing that happened last time " hey lets watch this movie.." " there aren't enough seats.." "let's share" [ Ben and I ]. Chyeah. i applaud my mother for throwing the couch we use to have there out. :]

but real talk : that was like, the first time he ever had.. well, you know what.. and i think its so funny because i'm just thinking back to what i was thinking at the time.. i just kept singing random lyrics over and over really fast in my head and being like OHMYGOD ITS TOTALLY WHAT I THOUGHT IT WAS!!! i know thats probably really lame,but i guess that means ..he thinks im .. well idk. but yeah?

i thought it would really disturb me, but it didn't. at all. didn't even gross me out in the slightest. so thats good.  i guess that means im not as immature as i think i am, ahahaha.

Anyways, he kept like,squeezing me & bringing his.. well.. yeah... closer to me. so uuh yeah. ahahah. At first i was like " theres no way thats what i think it is" so i was all casually scratching my thigh, which was right next to his.. yeah.. and i moved my fingers over a bit and it TOTALLY WAS WHAT I THOUGHT. i was like HA :D / : O

or something along those lines.

We basically snuggled for the entire night and i woke up in the morning.. like, alone. and in alot of pain, my body was like oragami and my back was broken. 

so that was my highlight  ( i mean the thing before,.. not waking up alone ahahah )

anyways so this year is almost over. ( THANK GOD ). the other good things that came from this year were me and shawn becoming closer.. incedents with ben, explorer and alcohol/ partys.

YEAH GUY.

anyways i better dip to the set. time for me to watch my so called life and drool over Jordan Catalono ( Jared Leto ).

Loves you!

shitmas.

i legit dont think i like christmas anymore.

and your only as small as the world will make you seem.

room is cleany cleany cleaaaan and it feels so refreshing! i love love love it. i honestly dont know how i lived in my messy room. ( well i do... ) but now it feels good to have people over and i absolutely love just... hanging out in my room [ even if its alone ahaha ]

tomorrow i'm going to shawns house ( or should i say, today.. since it's 1 : 17 am) we're going to clean her room. i find this exciiiiting.

i kind of like organizing. 

and i am a creep.. so i like seeing other peoples posessions ahaha.

but yeah. spencer put up the things in my room today..a frame with 3 pictures and my playboy thing.. that like holds all my paper and makes it look pretty!

its a tad exciting!! now all i need to do is get shawn & KB on board to help me decorate! its a tad... boring .. so blank! we'll seee if we can fix this. amiright ?

kay nightie night. i have to go read and tomorrow morning shawn will call me so i can make my way down yonder.

tonight i want to dream about candy canes and lollipops.

MERRY CHRISTMAS! :)

your only as tall as your heart will let you be

Just thought i'd share the grossest picture. ever.

hooray for drunken pictures..

( why do photo's like these even EXIST )

exchange !

YEAH GUY!

so we did our present exchange at kb's new house ( it was aweeesome, just saying ).

BASICALLY:

kb got me : supernatural season 1, body shop stuff, snow globe, chocolates!

i got shawn : season 1 of hero's.

shawn got danielle : a necklace, a shirt, [ uuuuh i think there was something else, but my brain has misplaced it...]

danielle got kb : a frame, 2 shirts.

it was really fun/awesome. i like how we ended up ACTUALLY painting our faces pink..drinking and ending up at a gas station eating frog candys.

YUPP. 

love scarborough.

EXCITEMENT!!!

its almost christmas! ... but even closer than christmas is the present exchange at kb's new house. i am SOSOSOSO excited!!!

basically:

Danielle has Kb, Kb has MEE and I have shawn and shawn has danielle. or something along those lines.

YAY!!!

chrisishithmas

so.. i got shawn her present. and it was a tad exspensive. but i feel like i need to get her something more because i feel like i woudent be satisfied with just this. well.. actually i feel like i would be satisfied because i would want this gift.. but idk if shawn would so im like jfhjkdsfsjf and trying to figure out someway i can get more money to buy something more.

but i spent all my money.

but i will be a champ and attempt to come up with more.

( aka : no drinking,partying,lunch,TTC money...or .. well anything)

but i think this is all for a good cause because i love giving gifts to people.

like. its just so exciting!!!!!

i cant wait to get my present from KB too.

happyness and whatnot =]

essence.

this is the essence of my awkwardness.

famillyyy

Missing trip!!!!!

these guys are my family! i havent seen them in way too long. planning to see eachother over christmas break. i hooppe it works out!!

gunther!

so i love gunther. please watch all his videos on youtube! esepcially his jokes music videos. hes totally the maaaan ahahahahaha

ps. enjoy some cute pictures of me. i feel like a post isnt a post without a picture. dont ask me why...

makes no sense...

( also : this picture is hilarious. im on my moms new macbookpro and this is a picture that was on it.. so your very welcome for that,friends )

kay so this is going to make ZERO sense.

but.. i miss myself !

ahahahahahahha

i was just looking at old pictures on here/dailybooth and i was like holy shit.. i have changed so much. i miss the old me!!

cheap joke

honestly.  where do i even begin.

i just feel.. really awful right now. like.. it didnt hit me until now how bad i feel. i cant tell how i feel anymore. i remember when i was falling so hard for ben, i'd have literally done anything to have him, be with him, be near him. lately i have been treating him like a good friend. instead of what i use to do. "ben's coming over ?" and then i'd run around doing everything i could possibly do to look better.. to seem 'perfect' so that he'd like me. i'd do anything reid said so that he would let me hangout with them. and now ? i dont do anything. i look like a mess ? well. then i look like a mess. its like i've given up.

or maybe i was just so use to liking ben i couldent tell that.. i dont anymore. and thats just it. i dont want to not like him anymore. i want to. really badly. its like everything i did to seem perfect for him, helped me, made me a better person. and even though.. he doesent like me/never did.. i kind of got something good from it. all i know is.. one of the happiest moments i have experienced ( and i know this sounds lame ) .. is when he snuggles with me. being so close to someone you like. and being warm and happy. its the best. i dont know any other way to put it. last night i fell asleep next to him and when he put his arm around me and pulled me closer i was really happy, relaxed and.. i felt like i must've done something right. but then he stopped. he only did it for less than a minute. and it was over. for the rest of the night he didnt so much as touch me. ( except for when he pushed me off the matress and elbowed me in the face a couple times ) 

honestly. 

i just feel so ... bad. 

i cant tell if i still like him or not. and does it really matter ? nothing will come of it. ben practically said so himself. 

i just feel a little bit like a cheap joke. like he can come to me whenever he wants to snuggle,flirt,fall asleep etc with someone. it means nothing. 

why cant life be like in books when the girl gets the guy. and their perfect for eachother.

why cant ben take care of the things i give him ? why cant he not loose everything. why cant he not keep it in one peice. why does he care so little ?

i feel like such a girl saying this stuff. but its true. and i wish it werent. i wish i could go back to when i'd be all giddy and happy if he said 'hey' to me. 

i just feel like an idiot.

and im pretty much just really frustrated/fed up with everything. 

should i ignore him for the next little bit? should i continue on like nothing is bothering me ? should i just leave everyttime he comes around ? i REALLY dont know. 

it kills me that this may be ending. the thing that never was. 

dkfgsdjkgdfjg i just feel so stupid!!!!

and its confusing. heart breaking and hkgjhdg i dont even know how to sum up what im feeling right now.

i just want to be somewhere else. with a different agenda. 

i cant even write this anymore.

goddamnit.

i want to watch supernatural and obsess over jensen ackles.

i want to eat popcorn and be in my pajama's. i want to fall asleep in a tidy room with a made bed. i want to be a different person.

i want to be proud of myself. and know what i want.

but im stuck with me.. and i guess you are too.

i dont know if i should apologize for that or not. but i am sorry you have to listen to my girlish rants about.. bullshit.

lab

so i'm totally at school right now and this computer is so fucked up i have to write in the smallest font so no one can read what i write.. even though they fully CAN see what i am saying.. because its so fucked up. but no worries i believe there is only 5 more minutes of class.. then its math time! god i hate math. i have the biggest urge to skip. but i know nothing good can come of that. what'll i do ? go home and sit around? why ? pointless.
see, i know that when i suaually skip but sometimes doing nothing is better than school. NAM SAYIN. okay no. but actch.
i just finnished a book. we're suppose to be writing about endangered species but WHATEVER. i'll just hand in the one i did at northern. ahahah.
speaking of northern. my dad wants me to go back next year. i was like NO. even though northern has all the classes i want to take. blah. i'll deal with pats.
i think this needs a picture. but i dont have any.. im not even on my account ( i dont have one). okay i think im going to.. web messenger ? does that even work ? JOKES. this class ends at 1 20. so i have like 7 minutes left. GTS.
i really really really really want to go home. BUT I WONT.
on a happy note : FASHION SHOW. tomorrow i think. whoooraaay. im so excited. 12 $ totes worth it. i just wish i could go to the after party :(
IDK what i'll do on friday. find some random friend to chill with ahahaha.
but have fun!!! ( i feel like i am coming off angry.. i am not mad at all. i am being truth and whatnot.. i srsly hope you have fun.. im not being a bitch. PROMISES)
4 mo minaaats.
AHAHAH I GOOGLE SEARCHED GHETTO IN IMAGES.
I FOUND THAT PICTURE OF THE BLACK CHICKS PROM DRESS. WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU CUT A HOLE FOR YOUR STOMACH !? OH JEEZ FAIL. !!!!

ps. umm.. ben told me i said really loudly that taylor asked me out. to everyone. infront of taylor. while i was drunk. but i dont believe this. i havent drank with taylor since we dropped you off at d bag ville. and that was before he asked me out. so da hellll ?
KAY BYE.

SHAWTY.

middle parts? why ahahahahah.

okay so i have no idea how you could type while watching supernatural. when im watching it i cant do anything i am os focused. but thats just me.. ahahah

i am typing with these new gloves my mom made me and its a tad hard.

on the note of what we'll do today : i was thinking we should get dressed up ( cuz its fun and whatnot) and then go out for dinner. and when i say ' go out to dinner ' i mean ' we have no money lets go to BKlounge' yeah yeah yeah ? greaaaat.

i actually have done some PRE dressed up. i'm actually really liking what i am wearing right now. but everytime i get dressed up where i feel all pretty and whatnot my brother makes fun of me. he says i look weird and stuff. so then i actually sort of believe it.. then when hes around im all JGSDF,JHSGFSHDFG. ahahahaha im so stupid.

ohmygod. sorry this may be really mean. but theres this short and fat italian kid in my first period class. hes so awks/gross. yesterday we were in the library and he was like ' I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE THIS SONG...' and then he played 'party in the usa' really loud. i was like =\

never can i listen to this and think its cool.

ahahah i wish you were there to see him.

OH. may or may not be hooking up  a cell phone today. LEGIT.

floating head.

so i'm sitting in my room right now eating babybel. which is NOT as good as i remember as a kid. kind of tastes like plastic/old milk. bUT ANYWAYS..

im listening to barelypolitical which is AMAZING. i love auto tune the news.

but REAL TALK: I'm sorry i havent written here in a while. i've been busy.. packaging,obsessing over stupid things, trashing my room, going to school, failing civics for the 2nd time, reading, shopping and of course watching movies. but here is the DL on what you've missed :

HALLOWEEN was ridic. 

FRIDAYS: always retarded.

i think my new favourite thing to do is drink with my brother. always ends nicely.

minus when i puked up watermelon and hyperventalated until i fell asleep. BUT THATS A STORY FOR ANOTHER TIME/NEVER.

my great uncle is coming to visit tomorrow ?  i think..

anyways. all i am thinking about now is how i wish my life was auto tuned.

..and i wish i didnt eat 2 babybel's. 

AND I WISH MY ROOM WAS CLEAN. FML.

oh.. i got so distracted there for like 20 minutes.

gosh. i think i am going to go see if i can 'recover' the thing i wrote on the computer in the basement. MY COMPUTER CRASHED. so frustrating!!!

i want to see that movie 'inside hana's suitcase' .

just saying.

WHITE FOLKS.

byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

no big

SO I JUST ATE 12 FUDGSICLES AND PUKED IN A GARBAGE CAN.

its gonna be a good night

BULLSHIT

FLOATING HEAD. i thought this picture was necessary. (morning time ladies)

so this weekend has been CRAZY. i honestly dont even know.

well i do.

I KNOW I'D LIKE TO FORGET FRIDAY AND ALL ITS PISS-PUKE-WATERMELON BULLSHIT.

uuuhmm... pretty much i fell asleep with ben, covered in piss and puke.. i can only imagine how awful i smelt. sorry...

crazy night i wish never happened.

i still feel so bad about that... BUT I WASNT FAKING SO FUCK YOU REID.

but actually : ben said he liked the shirt. i still feel so embarassed though. when he came over my face went bright red and i hid for a good 20 minutes. 

.. he asked me " are you wearing rouge " " what the hell is that ? " " like blush..." " no, actually im not wearing makeup.."

FUUUUUUCK.

he gave me a hug and said thanks for the shirt and that he really likes it.

the hug was so awkward because i was all shy/embarassed and he just like went in for the full thing NAM SAYIN.

ps. FML

pps. " nooooo mom, i just really want ben .. im not drunk i swear.. i just really want him. beeen huuug meeeeee "

FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL...fml

lonesome on my ownsome..

ahaha awful photo. but who really cares ?

so this long weekend was really good. even though i STILL have a headache. dont really know why ( ive had it since sunday morn ) buuuut anyways...

MY GOD I AM SO LONESOME. well. i mean, like, i know what your answer will be to this, but I JUST REALLY THINK I NEED A BOYFRIEND. like sweet god. its about time, am i right ?

your answer :the whole world wants a boyfriend, budd.

( okay i realise thats what i told you when you said you wanted a boydfriend.. but still )

its weird. i still really like him. but its like.. i use to think he was everything. you know ? and now its like the more i fall out of love with him, the more he pulls moves on me ?

IDK. i still really really like him X 100000000. but . do you know what i am saying ?

its like when he ignores me, i just think 'why do i even like this guy ?!' and then he pays attention to me and im all ' this is why, look at his eyes, his hair, his smile.. his personality.. almost like hes perfect' BUT FUCKING HELL. 

i guess its all part of being a girl.

sometimes i wonder if i just get an actual boyfriend if he'll be jelous. or even care.

a part of me is like ... you know he would mackenzie. and another part of me is like 'are you so sure ?' 

godamn teenage angst. NAM SAYIN' !?

i just remember i tried to be what i thought he wanted. and he didnt seem to feel it. ( if you know what i am talking about ) but the more im like FUCK IT. and im just myself. the more he pulls his moves.

BUT WHY THE FUCK DOES HE ONLY DO IT WHEN HE DRINKS.

slash.

he looks at me and im all ' okay you cant look at someone like that without liking them '

but he only ever does anything physical ( and not that much phsicalness at that ) when hes been drinking.

PEWP PEWP PEWP.

ahaha oh man.

im such a looooser.

im pretty sure he's coming over tonight. i hope he stays over.

fml.

FAVE

this is totally my background on my computer.. dont plan on changing it in a whiiille.

i love dean. ( jenson ackles )

shes got an axe.

when she come's you'll hide.

 but there's no where you can go she won't find.

she's big and bad and she's got an axe,

she'll deal you out your 40 whacks.

and she'll hide your parts around the house.

so you can live forever,

in a game of cat and mouse.

and every year in the same state

you'll relive that awful date.

so uuh made a poem thing while i was in the shower ahaha yes, i am that brand of weird.

so a tad... sad

wayne :

all that I can tell you is you need to give up on this, come to terms with how things are and accept that you can't be with him. Reality is a bitch and we can't always have what we truly want, even if it feels like you need it, even if it feels like it's the only way you can truly be happy. You're gonna have to let go. What will become of you if you hold on to this for any longer. You're putting yourself through shit you don't need. If it means you have to tell yourself a million times that it's not gonna happen and crying your eyes out something needs to be done

there's no point in playing for a crowd that won't clap

mack :

but.. this weekend

he was all yyeeah

Waynes

but where's your weekend now, holding on to the little things isn't going to get you over him any faster

I know I'm sounding like an ass but if you really want to get over him you're going to have to stop seeing every little thing as symbolic

mack

your right. you do sound like an ass

NOTE TO SELF : never express you need advice from wayne. it will end in you thinking your a dumbass and that your a sad pathetic excuse for a girl.

now i just feel really bad.

growing apart.

 not  appropriate for this entry but it made me laugh. so deal holmes.
I'm sitting here. in my room. after the  most amazing month of my life. listening to thomas newman. and wondering why i have to come back to such bullshit. august has been bliss and good times for me. i dont know why it has to turn around and shit on me.

I know i've lost a friend. a really really good friend. well. maybe not such a great friend, in the sense that they we're good to me. but we we're close. for 4 years. and it hurts to think that something that meant so much to me could mean so little to someone else. think of your bestfriend, you know they are always going to be there for you.. through thick and thin. i use to have that. i use to know everything about this person. we told eachother everything and held back nothing. but that's long gone. now i barely see this person, let alone talk to them. i have our old letters, our pictures our memorys. i have it all. its so hard trying to get over it when it's always staring you in the face. it's everywhere. she's not dead. but sometimes it feels like she is. 

when i think back to when i thought max was dead, this is how i felt. powerless. lost. alone. scared. but then that magical beam of light found me, and restored my missing peice.

it can't happen again. and i know that. 

as weird as it is to say, she was a part of me. and i'll miss her even if she doesn't miss me. i'll miss her selfishness, obsessions, awkwardness, her calls. her everything. 

and i wish i could just turn around and just laugh it off and know it's all just a game of hide and seek, it just took me a while to find her. i've had  moments like that with her before. but i know this time is different. she's not hiding somewhere i can find her. she's gone. 

this may sound overly dramatic. and it is.

its this god damn music man. i swear to you.

but i do miss her. and i don't.

people grow apart.

and it sucks. and it hurts. but thats what happens.

and i'd rather have this happen now then in 10 years when it would feel like someone sawing off a leg or an arm, rather than just the tip of my finger. it still hurts. but it could be worse.

i just hope you don't go through this as well.

i can't fix this anymore shawn. it's like the bowl. its shattered into so many peices.. and i cant find them all to glue them back together. she;s hiding them from me.

blah blah blah blah blah.

i just dont care. i do. you know i do. i just wish i didn't care.

honestly ? this month has been amazing. and i'm not going to let this shitty thing bring me down. i knew about it before hand. and i still managed to have a really good time.

it's you and me budd. i woulden't have it any other way. 

i like partys. i like fun. i want to live in a hamburger bun.

 dont you love it when your tan is your arms,back and face and no where else ? awesome paddlers tan. also : my tan is in the shape of my lifejacket. FAIL.growing up is fun. usually.

sorry anyways.. summer has been mad awesome. slash just august, crazy good.

next year i'm going away for the whole summer.. tres excitemont mais amie.

ON YOUR WHOLE BERTHA JIM  GEORGINA WHATNOT BUIS :

thats just stupid. if someone is willing to ruin a friendship over something like clothing, then they aren't the type of person you should be willing to count as one of your top friends.

and i know, trust me, i know it hurts to lose friends. like alot. i lost my best friend this summer as well, remember that. i realise mine had it coming and yours was out of the blue.. but it still really hurt. 

you could move past that moment in history with this person ? forgive them ? but is it worth it.. for them to think your a different person because of your clothing? .. why is that such a big deal anyways if we all judged eachother ( in the group ) on the way we dressed... it would make no sense. 

you'd think i was absolutly bonkers..

tonya was rich

**** is blind

etc etc

but thats not the way it is. because friendship is about the fucking person. not the clothing. jesus fucking christ thats gay.

its just making me angry thinking about it.

because, i know that i love you because of you shawn, and not because of your leggings or whatnot. anyways we're on the phone so we'll talk here.

loveee youu !!!

buddha moments like these keep my world turning..

I've been thinking. i mean really thinking.

and i don't know how else to express myself than with a keyboard, i can't use a pen because my hand starts to hurt and i can't use my mouth because there's no point. 

so i'm settling for this.

I think life is like a paved sidewalk, people work so hard to pave over things and make them seem easy, and to make it easier than taking a bumpy dirt road.. but there's always ditch's and footprints and trash that gets in the way. and sometimes its easier to fall then to watch where your going. But when you fall on pavement, you fall much harder than you would on a dirt road.

pavement is like rock. and that hurts.alot.

you cross path's and you make path's, but in the end it's not about wether you stumbled or fell, in the end it's where you came from and the great journey to a point when you can look back and know you've lived your life.

Its hard to put what i am thinking in words right now because so much is happening in my head that i can't seem to find peace, a moment to put everything together in a string and tie it in a bow.

I just think that Tonya's mum can hate me if she wants. i don't know what i did to deserve her hate, but i have it. I could hate her back, she's done many things to me that could justify my hate for her.. but life is more than that. and it's really not worth it. 

she doesen't have to accept me.

but i accept her.

people are people and they make mistakes, they stumble on the paths they create and they bump into other people going the same way, but in my opinion stumbling,tripping and mistakes shouldent make hatred arise.and i mean sure, it hurts. but really. build yourself a bridge and get over it.

it's much easier to see it as it is in a bigger picture than it is to have it all over your face.

people may scare you, bump you,push you but in the end its about how you handled it. your not going to remember how someone said this or someone did that, your going to remember what a good person you were or tried to be. so go out into the world and be the person you imagin yourself to be, show the world your not scared of obsticles, get in your car and fucking drive.

you may miss people you may hurt and cry but what the fuck. its life. and it happens. don't live too much in the past, and always give friends chances. because a friendship with limited chances is hardly a friendship at all. PEOPLE TRIP. PEOPLE STUMBLE. BUT PEOPLE CAN CATCH THEMSELVES.  don't wait for someone to do everything for you, because in the end you'll have nothing. god damnit don't pretend like you don't know what's going down here.

dkjghdjkgbdjgbdbgdjgbd 

i might just be talking nonsense. but its my nonsense. and i sorta kinda like it.

lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala..

shitty monday.

Just being more attractive than you, as per usual.

AND WHY ARE SO MANY OF MY FISH DYING ?!

tres sad.

i held my hair up to see what it would look like if it was short.

and from what you can see, it may not be such a bright idea.

DAMN.

i went for a nice motorcycle ride today. i llooooove it.

Vanessa and I are making plans, we're hanging on wednesday and i believe there is a sleepover in the making for tonight.

HUZAH.

i shall talk to you later my dear fwends.

super cool shotout : OH HEEEEEY THAR KARINA. SUB SUB SUB SUB SUB SUB .

THAAAAANKS 

XOX

SO LIKE YEAH

WE HAVE HAD SOME CASUALTYS  : one of my fish died. RIP.

ps. my boomerang won't come back.

MMMMM

at karina's house. her puppy is sleeeeepppinnng. adorable.

mum is picking me up right now.. hmmmm

listening to thomas newman and ultimatly feeling depressed ahahahahaha. not actually.

okay... arent these pictures just tres amazing ? YEAH I THOUGHT SO!!!!  ( errr... )

yeah ... pewp.

BYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEE

end of scene.

AHA! HA! HA!

mr.wallace.

/thread.

summer ?

it may be suuuuper hot in my room ( and,like everywhere else in toronto... )  but it doesen't really feel like summer. July is always so boring for me. its just like, a month long of anticipation for camp. ( attractive pictures, i knowww )

my room is a MESSSSSS. and i started a collage on my wall. my dad made me use sticky tack instead of tape. and sticky tack SUUUCKS. i hate it. went to the cottage this weekend. was tres awesome. mmmm.. yeah pretty much. i want to brush my teeth. tra lalalalalalala.

i smell like smoke. i smoked a salmon. so i smell like a campfire.

yeeeeeeeah... weird.

i really need to clean my room. SO MUCH WORK THOUGH. GODDAMNIT.

and onto other things...

things on the mackenzieverse are pretty alright right now. i plan on buying books tomorrow, hanging out with some loooser named karina ( love you ) and smiling alot.

so good plan ? I THINK SO.

other friends ? yeah. they suck ALOT.

mmmmmmmmmm can't wait until august.

and weirdly enough.. i can't wait until september. 

I KNOW THATS SO WRONG.

but july is so boring i am actually looking forward to hitler youth. and by hitler youth, i mean school.

OKAAAAAAAAAAY GOODBYEEEEEEE.

ps. my left leg is all tingly.

sweet tits.

i just found this pic on my brothers computer. wtf ?

the weekend was sicck. canoed like mad and whatnot. so awesome.

im in the city right now WHICH IS SO AWESOME! i am not looking forward to being taken back to stalag 14. im currently wearing way too many bracelets and rings. but i dont give a fuck.

straightened my hair for the first time since ever ( great sentence, i agree ).

im suppose to be cleaning and helping with the house BUT I REALLY REALLY DONT WANT TOO. like.at all. so i'm procrastinating. but i have a feeling my mum is ging to yell at me sometime soon. peeeeeeeeeeewp.

bracelets are cutting off circulation.

GOOD DAY TO YOU ALL.

meow meow meow I IS A CAT.

meow meow meow meow meow. I IS A CAT.

so i'm waiting for my mum to pick me up from school and i decided to take pictures. i dont know why. but im mad bored right now...this room is so messy its ridiculous, i hate how messy it is !! but this morning i slept through breakfast and at snack time i practically beat people for the last cinnabon. SERIOUSLY. those bready buns may be dry, but damn i was hungry ( please ignore how gross that sounds...)

so i have a bunch more of random pictures i took. but meeeh.

              SO BYE I GUESS!!!

attractive, i know.

so.. back at school. kind of REALLY bored right  now. we don't have study hall today ( YAY ) because we had a guest speaker who talked for like 5987498573 years about civics. so.. yeah. but msn and facebook is blocked, so that reeeeally sucks.

next year i dont know what i am going to do !! go to school in toronto? come back to this one ? like WTF IDK.

i'm doing a white water camping trip on palmer rapids in two weekends, which is going to be soo fun , i can't wait! and i had my camp meeting about explorer, these are the people in my group...( on my trip )...

-adam ( you know him. and ..lovve him ? )

- katie ( i hate her )

- shannon ( AWESOME )

- alyson ( AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME )

- mitch ( who is that ? )

- brad ( uuh.. tonya will be excited )

i might be missing someone, but whatever.

anyways imma dip.

LOVE YOU.

and wtf dude i havent talked to you in, like, forever.. call me or something 

xoxo

HUMBUG.

Is it just me, or does my new room mate look alot like kaitlyne Harris?

super cute. i like how i look sooo awkward in every one of these pictures ahahahahah

anyways... yeah i don't quite know what to talk about ?? it's mad boring here at the moment. okay, so its not boring at all.. there is always stuff happening. and i am so content sitting here in my toki doki pajama's and wool socks. my desk is in the corner of the room next to our bookshelf ( that is FULL of textbooks...MAD AMMOUNT OF WORK,HOLMES ) 

its so comphy in this corner, i love it <3>

today is monday, so there is no sports. i love just relaxing. its so rare, i love it.

wait.. what the hell am i listening too ?? it's some man rapping about a bag of chips and a yo yo... im a straight up G' no lie.

anyways.. i burnt my tounge the other day on these chili lollipops this girl gave me.. no big.

i can't wait until thursday. I'LL MOST LIKELY SEE B. OMGOMOGMOGMOGMOGMOG. I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM, IN,LIKE, MORE THAN A WEEK.

ahahahahahahhaah

during study hall today, i decided i didn't want to do any homework, so i drew the whole time..now i have a very interesting sketchbook this year. i love it, i'll have to show you it when i come home ( we must see eachother ).

anyways.. i'm listening to banjo's dueling and Karina is like WTF IS THIS ?

i'm a free spirit, what can i say ?

i lied. im just a huge fag.